My Star Wars Confession

So call me strange, out of touch, sheltered or whatever you want, but up until about three weeks ago, I had never seen a single episode of Star Wars!  The primary reason I never watched a single episode of Star Wars was that I had no clue what it was about and from my perspective,  it looked weird and made absolutely not sense.  So when my fourteen year old son recently watched all of the episodes with his cousin, he borrowed his cousins DVD's and asked if I wanted to watch with him.  I did what every great father does and told him, "absolutely-NOT!"   After several days of his persistent pleading, I finally gave in and told him I would watch ONE of the movies.

Honestly, I only agreed just to let him know that I loved him enough to sit down with him to watch something I had no interest in at all. ( I figured it couldn't be worse than watching Titanic with my wife!)  He tried to explain the idea of how the episode was everything that happened at the end of all of the episodes, or something to that effect.  I was more confused at that point and almost told him to forget it!

To make a long story short, I started watching with him and lo and behold, it actually made a little bit of sense.  Of course after watching, I had to find out what happened in the next movie and of course the next as well!  Over the course of a few weeks, we ended up watching maybe five movies.  Sure enough, my complete and utter confusion had been transformed into a mild case of confusion!

Once we finished all of the episodes and Darth Vader met his demise, a thought hit me that became the main point of this blog.  As I mentioned before, the reason I never watched was because I didn't understand the point of Star Wars.  It made me think about how we have a tendency to avoid people or things that we do not understand.  We don't hang out with people of other races because we don't understand them.  We shout down those who vote differently instead of trying to understand why it is that they think and vote differently.  We refuse to worship with others because how they worship looks or seems foreign to us.  We don't try new foods because it looks weird compared to what we are used to.  On and on the vicious cycle of ignorance goes.  How many experiences have we missed out on because it is easier to avoid something than it is to embrace it and draw a conclusion following the experience?  How much more enriched would our life be if we took a little time to view things or individuals from another perspective?

The first episode of Star Wars came out in 1977.  I was six years old.  Almost 40 years later I finally have a better understanding of something I never had any desire to understand.  I let my guard down and tried something new and I find myself in a position where I am kind of anxious for the 2017 release of Episode VIII.  Make no mistake, I'm still a little confused, and I won't be waiting outside the theater in a Darth Vader suit for days before the premier, but I look forward to sitting down with my son again and watching the next episode-once it comes out at Redbox of course!

I hope you enjoyed reading!  Here another post I wrote in the past if you want a little bit more! Where is Your Happiest Place On Earth?

Life Lessons From a Football Practice

This past weekend we attended a scrimmage for the Fresno State Football team.  Following the practice,  the fans were allowed onto the field to meet the players and coaches.  My son wanted to wait and meet the quarterback of the team, Chason Virgil.  The field quickly cleared out, but Chason was still running sprints with another player from the team.  After about  thirty minutes,  it finally looked like they were finished any my son would get his picture.

Chason slowly made his way across the field, but he wasn't walking.  He and his teammate were on the ground rolling towards us from the far north end zone.  It took about ten more minutes, but eventually they made it across the field and finished about ten yards past the south end zone.  For those who aren't familiar with football, the field is 100 yards long, so they rolled approximately 115 yards!  It was barely audible, but as they came closer you could hear one say, "I throw interceptions" and the other, "I turn the ball over" each time they rolled over. It became very apparent they were paying the price for their mistakes during the practice.

By the time they finished there was only about five people left in the stadium as everyone else had escaped the brutal heat of a typical Fresno summer.  I told Chason that I felt bad asking after what he had just endured, but my son wanted to take a picture with him.  He responded politely, "no problem!"  After giving him a few minutes to gulp a sports drink and rest, we got our pictures and headed on our way.

 There were several things I took away from this experience.

1.  It makes no difference if we are the quarterback of the team or an employee in the office, even the best of us make mistakes-and our mistakes always have consequences.

2.  Too often we only see athletes and musicians at their best, but we don't see the hours of preparation that is required.  Most Bulldog fans will see Chason tossing touchdown passes or scrambling for long runs under the bright lights on Saturday nights, but hardly anyone witnessed what we saw that day.  The games will look easy because of all the hard work done behind the scenes.

3.  Sometimes we will face pain and punishment all alone. Sometimes others are suffering and we leave them alone.   The rest of the team had already left for the cold showers while their teammates were rolling across the field in the heat.  We should be there for the ups and the downs.

4.  We don't always look like what we have been through.   After enduring all the extra work he had to put in, Chason put a big smile on his face and took a great picture with my kids.  The picture shows a young man who appears to have no worries and certainly doesn't indicate the extreme discomfort he was undoubtedly feeling.

I hope Chason Virgil has an incredible career at Fresno State and beyond.  Regardless of what the future holds for him, I know he has at least three life long fans-me and my sons.  I know they will never forget seeing him roll across the ground and then gladly take a picture with them.  Someone did a good job raising him and I can only pray that my kids are as considerate and gracious as this young man showed himself to be.

Thanks for reading!

Just Take One Small Step!

My recent decision to try and get a little healthier and more physically fit prompted this thought.  It took me a few years to get into the shape I am in now.  Bad eating habits, no exercise habit and other faulty choices got me to where I am today.  There are no health issues that prompted this change, just a desire to change the course I was on, a course that would undoubtedly lead to health issues sometime in the near future.

One of the pitfalls of making a major change is the desire to undo years of neglect within a matter of a few weeks or months.  In fact, sometimes we don't even try to make changes in our habits or lifestyle because the mountain that our issue has become seems too high to overcome.  We stay overweight because we believe that we can never lose all the table muscle we have accumulated over the years.  We stay in the sea of debt because our bills have ballooned into a seemingly insurmountable balance.  We stay in a job we hate because our mindset is so polluted with negativity that we think we can't do anything about it.  Our marriages suffer because the problems seem much too big to keep us out of divorce court.

The reality is however, that if you can make up in your mind that you want change, you can definitely change. It is as simple as taking one small step away from where you are, into the direction you want to go and then repeating the process.  Drink one less soda, or take a five minute walk to kick start your weight loss program.  Have one less Starbucks per week, or pack a lunch for work one day a week and put that money towards your debt.  Fix up your resume or start investigating how to start that small business you keep dreaming about.  Avoid another argument by overlooking something that seems significant (but in reality is not a big deal) that your spouse does.

All of these steps seem insignificant, but if you take just that one step, you will be one step further away from the drama and mess that you are in, and one step closer to where it is you want or need to be.  It is really that easy, and honestly that hard.  Lao Tzu said that "The journey of a thousand miles begins with ONE step."  The choice is yours, stay where you are and wonder how everyone else got to where they are in life, or just take one small step towards your new future!

Thanks for reading!  Here is an inspiring story about a kid who now lives in Fresno, but walked 1600 to get to a better future!  http://abc30.com/news/edison-high-student-tell-incredible-story-of-1600-mile-trek-to-america/1319687/

A Dog Gone Lesson

Those that know me best or that follow me on social media know that I have a knack for finding a message or lesson in everyday occurrences.  Today is no different as we celebrate the return of our dog Joey after he somehow escaped yesterday and disappeared for approximately eighteen hours.

Last night the house was full of emotion as we gave up our search and grappled with all of the worse case scenario thoughts that kept passing through our minds.  We know that most dogs are intelligent and that there was a pretty good chance Joey was out just looking for some female companionship and would return.  Understandably, the thoughts of him never returning, being hit by a car or some other tragic end kept creeping into our heads as bedtime neared.  By the time the kids got into bed everyone was crying and they finally fell asleep, exhausted from the trauma of losing their friend.

I could not let a bad time go to waste however, and before the kids fell asleep I made sure to use this scenario as a teaching moment.  I made sure they knew that if they ever thought about running away, not coming home, or not advising us of their whereabouts, they would put us in a position to experience the very same emotions they were feeling with Joey being gone.  The stress of not knowing if they were safe, if we would ever see them again or if they were in danger are very real fears that they were now feeling for themselves.

I felt a strong sense of relief as the sun rose today and Joey emerged from around the corner of the house.  There was a sense of joy and excitement at 6:30 a.m. as the kids woke up and realized their puppy was back.  At the same time, there was a sense of sadness I felt as I thought about this whole story.  Our dog ran away and our emotions went crazy wondering where he was and if he was OK.  I realized that sometimes our actions cause others a great deal of stress and anxiety.  I realized that we need to think before we take action.  Our actions have a way of negatively impacting and disrupting the lives of our family members, our friends, our coworkers and everyone else that we interact with on a personal or professional level.  The opposite is true as well.  Our actions can also encourage, empower or positively impact the lives of those around us.  The question is, are we selfless enough to think before we act?  It is a good Dog Gone Lesson to learn.

Thanks for reading!

Ten Things I'm Doing To "Lose Weight" This Year

The new year is almost a full day old and the resolutions and goals are being worked on as we speak.  I need to lose a few pounds and am making a few changes to accomplish my personal goals.  The weight I have already started to lose goes beyond the pounds measured on a scale.  Below you will find a list of what I am doing to shed some extra weight I am carrying around.  Feel free to join me on this weight loss program or develop a list of your own!

1.  I am letting go of the mistakes I made last year and will not carry the weight of guilt into 2016.

2.  I am letting go of dead relationships that are weighing me down and investing in healthy relationships.

3.  I am refusing to carry the weight of worry about things that are completely out of my control.

4.  I am continuing on the path of getting rid of debt that is weighing down my financial future.

5.  I am getting rid of excess clutter that is just sitting around taking up space.

6.  I am going to do better at saying "no" to things that don't matter so I can say "yes" to the important things.

7.   I am trying to stop carrying the weight of worry other peoples opinion about me or my decisions.

8.   I won't let fear of the unknown prevent me from taking risks and will put my faith in God instead.

9.   I am going to take responsibility for my future and allow God to carry the weight of what I can't handle.

10. I am going to eat a little bit better, exercise a little more and replace a few sodas with water.

Happy New Year!

Remember Who Stayed In The Rain!

Last week a friend offered me a couple of tickets to the Fresno State Football game against UNLV.  Fresno State Football has hit a rough patch, and I suspect there may have been as many free tickets available as there were empty seats at the stadium.  Lose a couple of games, lose a few key players to injury, run into a few issues and the casual fan tends to give up and stay away.

This game seemed to be going the way of the previous three games that all resulted in losses.  Although the game was tied at halftime, many fans made their way to the exits, easily leaving more empty than occupied seats in the stadium.  UNLV had built a substantial lead by the end of the third quarter, so just about everyone else headed out, leaving a crowd the size of a high school rivalry game in the 41,031 seat stadium.  The fans that remained came to life as the Bulldogs rallied and eventually took a three point lead with little time left in the game!

To make a long story short, UNLV brought the ball down the field and was within field goal range, when suddenly the heavens opened up and an absolute downpour fell on the stadium.  Like cockroaches scattering in the light, more people scurried to the exits and left the team to try and hold on in front of the couple of hundred people who stuck around in the pouring rain.  A strong defensive stand and the pouring rain proved to be too much for UNLV, as the Bulldogs hung on for a well deserved and much needed win.

This game reminded me of how life can sometimes be.  You suffer a few losses and fall into a little trouble and people stop showing up and find every reason possible to stay away.  Even the individuals who still come will likely walk away when things start falling apart and it looks like you are a lost cause.  Let a serious storm hit your life and most of the people who are still there will soon vanish, leaving you with almost no support.  While it is easy to focus on everyone who left you, I want to encourage someone to focus on the few who stayed with you in the rain.  Thank the individuals who weathered the storm with you and were present during your toughest battles.  Forget the ones that left you and celebrate, appreciate and always remember the ones who stayed with you in the rain!

Thanks for reading!

See You At The Top!

A few days ago we were at a local amusement park for an afternoon of fun with the kids.  My daughter told us that she wanted to climb the rock wall that is pictured above.  After insisting that she was too light, too short, to young and basically any other excuse I could muster, we relented and let her try.  She was tired from a long day at school and had never climbed before, so I figured she would struggle to pull herself off of the ground and would soon give up.  As you can see from the picture, she nearly made it to the top of the 32 foot wall!  A few days later she made another series of attempts and was able to ring the buzzer at the top of the wall!  I learned a few lessons that I thought I would share.

The first lesson is that we need to avoid making assumptions.  How often do we discourage our kids from even trying something we think they can't accomplish?  How many dreams have our assumptions killed?  I assumed my daughter didn't have the physical strength to make it to the top and almost prevented her from reaching a milestone in her young life.

The next lesson is that persistence pays off.  How many adventures have we missed out on by giving up too soon?  My daughter would have never reached the top had she given up and not repeatedly begged to try.  She would have never experienced the thrill of scaling a wall that is about ten times her size!

The third and final lesson is that we need to have faith in ourselves and in our God given abilities; even when nobody else believes.  How many times have we given up for lack of belief in ourselves?  In spite of my lack of faith in her, my daughter believed that she could climb that wall.  She stared the challenge in the face, ignored the obvious difficulty of the task and proved that she could do what only she believed she could do.

So, don't be a dream killer, keep pressing forward in spite of the naysayers, believe in yourself and we will see you at the top!

Thanks for reading!  Click this link to catch up on an old post that may encourage you if you think you are  insignificant:  http://jonathanpantages.blogspot.com/2014/12/the-drum-line.html