I Didn't Get Pictures, But The Memory Is In My Head!

My Father's Day weekend got off to a great start yesterday!  Ethan and I were invited to go deep sea fishing with the Police Activities League, and while it was a new experience for both of us, we nervously accepted and boarded a bus for Monterey. The weather was incredible as we arrived and walked down the wharf towards our boat.  Stories of sea sickness floated through my head, so I very reluctantly resisted the urge to stop for clam chowder.  I reasoned that I did not want to spend $6 for a bowl of chowder, only to leave it somewhere in the Monterey Bay!

We boarded and got settled near the rear of the boat.  Neither of us had a clue what to do, but the helpful crew and my observant nature helped us to get along just fine.  As we left shore and headed into the bay, we quickly heard the comments that "the water is rough today".  Indeed, the waves were large and created the perfect conditions for a roller coaster like ride; something Ethan and I both enjoy.  It didn't take very long for the back end of the boat to become crowded with people tossing their breakfast, and maybe the previous day’s dinner overboard!  I kept asking Ethan if he was OK, and each time he responded confidently that he was fine!  After about a 30 minute trip, we reached our first fishing area and were told we could cast our lines.

The adventure was underway, and it didn't take more than two minutes for Ethan to get a bite on his line!  As he reeled in his line, we realized that in a matter of a couple of minutes, he had caught his first TWO fish!  As I helped him out, my line started jerking like a child tugging your shirt when they are hungry!  I had caught two as well!  Ultimately, we caught our limit of 10 fish while dodging everyone running to the rail to make their contributions to the ecosystem.  The day concluded with neither of us getting sick.  I got my bowl of clam chowder as we headed to the bus with about fifteen pounds of fish that had been filleted for us on the boat. Ethan loved every minute of it and I learned how to stick my finger in the mouth of a fish to remove the hook-something that had always grossed me out!

As we arrived back in town, I Tweeted about the trip, and a "virtual friend" from Tennessee,  (follow @1DanLawson for some great, positive Tweets) who happens to be the father of Ms. Tennessee 2012, Tweeted back, "Gotta post the Pics!"  Mr. Lawson inspired this post, as right then I realized that we were having so much fun together, and so caught up in the moment, not to mention the boat was rocking very hard, that I had failed to take any pictures of Ethan catching fish!

Then a thought hit me, (of course you are probably thinking!) how many times have we missed out on a great moment because we are busy taking pictures?  Think about it, our kid makes a great play on the field, but we didn't really see it because we were staring at the display on our phones. Maybe they walk across the stage to receive an award or a diploma, but we catch the moment through the filter of a camera.  That awesome musical performance was missed as we struggled to focus our camera or unlock our cell phones! 

I didn't get a single picture of him catching fish, but every single memory of the day is seared into my mind!  Pictures can be destroyed or lost, but should I ever have the misfortune of losing my sight, nothing can take away the "photo" that is ingrained into my memory!  Too often we focus so much on capturing the event on our camera and we miss out on the actual event that is now gone forever!  So I say to you, take a photo if you can, but please don't miss "the moment" big or small.  Fortunately, someone on the trip was assigned to take photos, so I know we posed for one, and if we are lucky, maybe we not only have the great memory of that day in our hearts and minds, but there may be pictures to prove that we really did catch some fish!

Happy Fathers Day to all the dads out there, and as always, thanks for reading!

Ps.  @1DanLawson that is a GREAT picture/Fathers Day card Chandler sent you!  Nice picture of that fish!  Ha Ha!

It's June, In Fresno! Of Course It's Hot!!

It is 2:51 pm as I type this post.  The mercury has already hit 104 degrees; well on the way to the expected 110 degrees that has been forecast for today. It is very hot, but this is a typical Fresno summer.  The social media scene has heated up significantly with posts about how hot it is, or how unbearable the heat is.  Of course this made me think...

This is Fresno, home of hot summers.  While it may not be the best place to live, it is certainly not the worse.  Problem is, when it's hot, we complain that it is too hot.  When winter rolls around, we complain that it is too cold.  I am happy to announce my solution!  Move somewhere else!  You see we love to complain about stuff, but very few people have the courage to do anything about it.

This post is really not about Fresno, but about our tendency to complain about stuff, but our unwillingness to do anything about it.  Chuck Swindoll put it this way, "“We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our Attitudes.”

So often we lament the things that are wrong in life, but in reality, it is what it is, and how we react to the circumstance often determines whether we are miserable in 110 degree weather, or just extremely uncomfortable in the same conditions.  Far too often we complain about political decisions, but we make excuses that "it doesn't matter" and fail to vote in the elections.  We complain that there is nothing to do in our city, but then we stay home and watch television instead of supporting a touring show, local business or restaurant.  We complain about how hot and boring Fresno is, but most of us don't have the courage to actually sell our possessions, uproot our lives and move to that utopia that is awaiting us somewhere else!

So bottom line is this, we have a couple of choices.  We can sit around pointing out everything that is wrong, or we can rise off our posteriors and do something to fix what is "wrong".  It IS hot today, but pointing it out on Twitter or Facebook didn't lower the temperature one single degree!  Go to the coast, stay indoors and watch a movie, or go to the mall or a water park.  Do something, but stop complaining!  It is 3:20 pm and it is now 106 degrees with 20% humidity, so it feels like 107 degrees, but why are you shocked?  After all, it is June; we are in Fresno, so of course it’s hot! Thank God we have a pool, so it is time to go swimming!

Thanks for reading!  As always, you are more than welcome to share this blog with anyone you wish.  If you want email notification when a new story is posted, simply input your email address on the right side of this page and follow the instructions!

Think every day doesn't matter?  Read this: http://jonathanpantages.blogspot.com/2013/04/make-every-day-count.html

Go Ahead And Ask!

Two recent events led to the genesis of this thought.  Recently a young high school student, Jake Davidson, utilized YouTube to ask Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model Kate Upton to be his prom date.  While she ultimately turned down his invitation, another swimsuit model, Nina Agdal stepped up and attended the prom with him!  In another bold move, local (Fresno) basketball star, turned NBA professional, Quincy Pondexter began a series of tweets that culminated with him asking Chandler Lawson, Ms. Tennessee out on a date!  She accepted the invitation!

This made me think of all the times fear, of being rejected kept me from asking for certain things.  I'm sure I'm not the only one who lost out on a promotion, a raise, a great opportunity, the chance to drive someone's exotic car, or maybe even a date with an individual that was “out of our league”.  Sometimes fear of rejection, low self-esteem, or other issues prevent us from stepping out and asking for what we want in life.  I was reminded of a very simple, yet profound Bible principle that says, "You do not have because you do not ask" (James 4:3).  While I have taken the verse slightly out of its context, the principal still applies.  While I'm sure the scripture is not referring specifically to asking someone out on a date, or to accompany you to the prom, the fact remains, in most cases, you must ask if you want something!

 So, instead of continuing on in life frustrated about "what could have been", or "if only" stop waiting for things to happen and begin to ask for what you want!  Ask the girl out!  Ask for the raise!  Ask her to marry you! Fill in the blank with your own specific situation and go for it.  Don't forever wonder, "What if?”, go ahead and ask!  Jake Davidson got rejected by a supermodel, but still went to the prom with another supermodel!  Quincy Pondexter risked public reject, sent a tweet, and got a date with Miss Tennessee!  At the end of the day, you may end up getting rejected, like Jake did, but end up with an equally great opportunity.  Perhaps you will get an immediate "Yes!" like Quincy Pondexter did and life will be good.  Even if you are flat out rejected and you don't get what it is you wanted, then perhaps it was not meant to be and your answer is somewhere else down the road.  In the meantime, face your fear of rejection, and "Go Ahead and Ask!"  

Thanks for reading, and as always, feel free to share this with anyone you wish!  Need to make a change in your life? Read this: http://jonathanpantages.blogspot.com/2012/10/change-can-be-good.html

Inspiration From a CEO

Recent statements by a CEO of a popular clothing brand have caused a great deal of chatter as of late.  It seems that the CEO of this particular company feels only certain people should wear his brand.  He was quoted as saying, "In every school there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids."  He continues, "Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don't belong [in our clothes], and they can't belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely. Those companies that are in trouble are trying to target everybody: young, old, fat, skinny. But then you become totally vanilla. You don't alienate anybody, but you don't excite anybody, either."

I must make one thing clear; I believe he has every right to believe what he believes and to market exclusively to whomever he wishes. I don't need to worry about shopping in his store since I am not cool enough, certainly not attractive enough (you should see his picture!) and I'm too fat to fit in his exclusionary garments.  While I admire his laser-like focus on his target market, I believe his comments are misguided.  After all, who cares if the money he earns comes from someone ugly?  Then again, he is the one with the billion dollar corporation, not me! 

As I read the article, I found myself getting angry at this individual that I don't even know.  I got angry because I believe his attitude is wrong, but then a story popped into my head.  In the Bible, (John 8:1-11) a woman is caught in adultery and according to the law, was to be stoned.  Jesus basically tells the accusers that the individual with no sin could go ahead and throw the first stone.  I found myself realizing that in some ways, I have, or have had the same attitude as this CEO, yet I was ready to call him to task! 

If we are honest, we would prefer to hang out with the cool and popular people, not the broke and busted individuals in the world.  Many of us would prefer to be seen with the owner of the company over the janitor.  Please don't read too much into this, but there was a time where I felt certain people should be excluded from churches due to their particular choices of sin.  Some will still not allow people into their particular organizations simply based on religious beliefs or political views.  Others do not have anyone with a different skin color or financial status in their circle of friends.  Most of us would not dare be seen with an individual with a turban for fear of what would be said about us. 

I decided not to mention the name of the CEO or company in this post.  I didn't want to give him any publicity beyond what I mentioned.  So what is my point?  Simply take a moment, as I did, and ask yourself if his remarks made you upset because they are offensive, because it stirs up some of the same attitudes in yourself, or perhaps both.  We can get mad at what he said, but we can also look at ourselves and see the areas in our life that reflect the exact mentality.  While we may not make millions of dollars, we may find ourselves living more enriched lives by including others instead of excluding those who look, act, think or worship different than us.

Thanks for reading!  If you enjoyed reading, you can subscribe by email and recieve notification when a new blog is posted.  Have some unfinished business in your life?  Read this: http://jonathanpantages.blogspot.com/2012/11/lessons-from-phil-jackson-and-lakers.html

The Empty Bedroom

This past weekend my two boys took a mini vacation to Northern California.  As bedtime came on Friday night, there was a strange quietness throughout the house.  As we put Sara to bed, we couldn't help but notice how empty the boy's room seemed to be.  Their absence was felt so strongly, that I felt as if someone had knocked the air out right out of my body.  My mind wandered a bit, and even though I knew they were having fun hanging out in Monterey, I could not escape the thought, "What if my boys were gone forever?”  I quickly pushed away any bad thoughts, and asked God to simply protect them. The sensation I felt was awful, but I knew my boys were safe with their grandpa and uncles and would be home soon.

A nagging sadness remained as I thought of people who have lost their children in accidents or to sickness.  It was as if God allowed me, for just a few moments, to "feel" the grief and emptiness of someone who has had a child die much too early.  I was almost forced me to tears as I tried to imagine the unbearable pain that some have endured.  As the boys returned from a weekend of playing at the beach and watching the Dodgers and Giants, I hugged them a little tighter and a little longer than usual.  It felt so good to have them home; even if I knew that within minutes they would probably be arguing and fighting!

If we are honest, our kids can sometimes make us wonder why we ever had kids in the first place!  They are not always on their best behavior, and do not always do what they are supposed to do.  We like to think our kids do no wrong, but we know they are not perfect and make mistakes.  Although our kids can get on our last nerve and sometimes drive us nuts, they are truly gifts from God.  Even though they sometimes embarrass us with their actions, drive us crazy with their endless questions, and seem to argue and fight non-stop, I will gladly take all of that over the quiet, empty bedroom. 

***Thanks for reading!  Feel free to share without asking for permission.  If you want notification when I post something new, enter your email address on my blog page and you will receive an email anytime I publish a new post!  By the way, it has been over 5 months since we celebrated thanksgiving.  If you need a reminder to be thankful, read this: http://jonathanpantages.blogspot.com/2012/11/are-you-still-thankful.html